Jonas Lara

Mad Lonely World

as I walk along and wonder
devour demons with my bare hands
thoughts exposed for a moment
feeling lonely
with people surrounding me
feeling lonely
hey yo Jonas, it’s gonna be ok
feeling lonely still
reject the drawers for the pills
taking over, expand the blood vessels
controlled thoughts no longer random
imagination held at ransom
only to exist, through terror tantrums
exists in the deepest abyss of my expression
feeling lonely
the most high is overshadowed by dark thoughts
not allowed to succeed so easily
not without struggle
try to break away hesitation, no concentration
friends look at my face and think they know where I’ve been
but have no idea
they think they know where I’ve been
they think they know what I know, where I’ve been
they’ve been thinking, they know what I know
what I think, I think that I know
where I’ve been, I think that I know where I’ve been to know why
for a moment, I’m feeling lonely

Remix of Mad World

Remix of Mad World (Gary Jules) by JUNX of RUGGED MERCINARIES / S.O.F.C

The piece is about dealing with depression. The fog, the confusion, the frustration, the feelings of self-doubt and loneliness even when your surrounded by loved ones.
Filmed & Edited by Jonas Lara

Chantelle Bateman

My name is Jonas Lara and I joined Marine Corps in August 2000 as an 81mm Mortar-man and sustained several injuries in preparations for the initial Iraq invasion of 2003. My unit deployed and I was left behind due to my injuries. I was subsequently medically discharged as a result in November 2003. After leaving the Marines I fell into a deep depression and what could be best described as “survivors guilt”. I needed an outlet to express the frustrations of transitioning to civilian life and dealing with my physical disabilities. I found that Art was the only thing that could capture what I was going through. In 2005 I started my journey as an artist first by enrolling at the Art Center College of Design where I received my Bachelors in Photography + Imaging. In 2010 I continued my studies at the School of Visual Art and received my MFA in Fine Art focusing on mixed-media art making. I currently have an art studio in Ventura, CA. I enjoy experimenting with various mediums including Photography, Video Drawing, Painting and Music.

gzaonas@gmail.com

www.jonaslara.com